Starting something new will always carry with it an element of uncertainty, risk and difficulty. The choice to start jiu-jitsu is in some regards an acceptance of the risks and uncertainty of starting something new.

As with life in general, the greatest opportunities for growth lie on the precipice of the unknown, in times of discomfort and through overcoming adversity.

Having just passed the one-year mark of my jiu-jitsu journey, it is a good time for me to reflect on some of the most important lessons I’ve learnt from jiu-jitsu, What I’ve gotten from jiu-jitsu and also my favorite aspects of jiu-jitsu

My three most important anecdotal lessons from jiu-jitsu to date as of 2020:

You’re going to suck AND things are going to suck- for a long time. You’ll feel uncoor

dinated and confused when drilling and defenseless when rolling- once you’ve been exposed to the staggering skill curve and skill ceiling of jiu-jitsu you soon realize the massive scope of the journey you’ve begun and you may also feel a bit intimidated. However! allowing yourself to be bad at something is the first step to improving. Inversely, refusing to allow yourself to lose in order to salvage your ego is a pernicious concept that will do immeasurable damage if you allow yourself to continue with this line of thinking. Being beaten is part of the learning pr

ocess and refusing to be beaten is denying yourself a chance to grow and improve both as a person and as a martial artist. For now, just remember that improvement is an incremental and active process and that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, sometimes that first step is just to walk through those doors and put in the hours. Everyone including the untouchable black belts and the elusive purple belts has had to start where you are now and it may seem impossible at first but the saying “black belts are just the white belts that didn’t give up” exists for a reason and goes to show that turning up, leaving your ego at the door and being open to learn is a dead simple surefire way to improve.

The people around you are both an immeasurably valuable resource and also some of the best people you’ll meet. In a learning capacity, being surrounded by people who are also actively trying to improve and learn aids massively in helping you improve. The common goal that exists between you and your training partner also does wonders for creating a relaxed and friendly atmosphere thanks in no small part to the attitudes and beliefs of the teaching staff- whose own personalities will serves as the se

ed from which the club or gym’s own atmosphere and personality will grow. Having visited other gyms on occasion I can confirm from my experience that- competitive coaches breed competitive gym culture, and in the case of Eastside, friendly and relaxed coaches equate to a friendly and relaxed gym culture/atmosphere.

Don’t concern yourself with an end date, it’s a lifelong journey. Setting nearsighted goals in an attempt to justify the time and effort you invest has been a trap I’ve tried very carefully to avoid. An example of this thinking may be “Man I can’t wait to get my stripe, belt promotion etc. then I’ll feel so much better” But what happens when you achieve your goal? Maybe you

feel demotivated by the fact that you’ve achieved your goal and yet you feel no better- because you’ve been exposed to just how much you still don’t know. The cycle of- sucking, improving and sucking again seemingly repeats itself indefinitely and I see it (or at least I think I do) in many of my teammates and also in myself. My personal solution and also my recommendation to others is to focus on “just getting better”, learning that submission that you still screw up, fixing and improving what you already know and slowly adding to your repertoire of moves. Focusing on an abstract concept as your goal as opposed to a fixed point in time allows you to continually improve without having to constantly readjust your goal and worry about losing motivation.

Final thoughts

The main takeaway from my first year of jiu-jitsu is to embrace everything. Embrace the process of sucking and improving, embrace your teammates both as training partners and as people and embrace the journey you’ve begun.

Andrew Helding

 

Standing in front of the mirror, I see a very different version of myself to what I was two years ago. I was fat. I was a smoker (for twelve years, with the longest break about two weeks). I was bored. I was undisciplined.

Now, I’m in the best shape I’ve been in for a decade. I’m proudly 18 months off the cigarettes. I have an amazing hobby with a great group of friends. I am far more disciplined and focused.

 

But reflecting deeper than the surface, there’s a few life lessons that I’ve picked up from my short time spent on the mats.

To be sure, there are countless lessons BJJ can teach us: be humble; looks can be deceiving; stay calm; just tap; small details matter; and on and on.

Maybe there will be an opportunity to share my thoughts on those but for now, if you’re still reading; here are my (metaphoric) reflections as a BJJ white belt.

Taking Failure with a Smile

There’s an old BJJ proverb, “You either win or you learn”. I’m not sure who said it first, but a Gracie somewhere is definitely taking the credit. I take it to mean that you will have to take failure with a smile. What do I mean by that?

Failure is part of the process.
You will tap repeatedly.
You will also be inoculated to the fear of failure.
It just won’t matter anymore.

We fail by not learning from our setbacks and making the necessary adjustments until we succeed. Every change we make, every person we roll with and every bit of information we absorb comes together so we can create a different outcome.

At the end of it all just smile at the fact that you have an opportunity to fail on the mats. And to learn from it.

The nexus between hard-work and progress

Ok, so let’s face it life isn’t fair. It’s not always the case that you get what you deserve. But I’ll tell you what, the harder you work for something the luckier you become, and the easier things happen for you.

Likewise, BJJ isn’t a democracy. Some are just gifted; others have to work harder for it. But everyone who wants to get anywhere in this craft, needs to spend the time on the mats.

It’s like that with life as well. Different people have different starting skills, upbringings, talents. But unlike life, which is nuanced and complicated, BJJ has a certain romantic simplicity about it. At the end of the roll, there’s a winner and a loser.

Talent is overrated.
The old adage, ‘Hard work beats talent, when talent doesn’t work hard’ is true for BJJ.

You can’t fake BJJ. You might be athletic; you might be talented. Yet, against hard work, you will be exposed. Ultimately, there’s an honesty about the mats. Your culture, creed, race, religion doesn’t matter; on the mats we’re all equal (aside from our belt colours of course).

What’s also deeply rewarding is the successes you finally achieve; the progress. It’s deeply rewarding because you can’t fake it.

Starting from zero

I can honestly say that in my adult life, I’ve never worked so hard and dedicated so much time to something that I continue to be pretty bad at. We all know how humbling that is. I think BJJ teaches you to be more empathetic with people who have different skill levels. Perhaps in the past I was only sympathetic to the fact they may have been less capable. Now, all I need to do is picture myself getting smashed repeatedly and I can immediately empathise.

As a result, I am better at recognising, and more receptive to, people in life who are working as hard as they can but aren’t seeing the results they’re hoping for, or I expect from them.

There’s really something special about learning a new skill, starting from zero.

Having a Plan B 

You’ve all probably read the ‘Serenity Prayer’. Its most common variant is:

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.”

Grips are not worth fighting for, in training. Have the wisdom not grip fight the 100 kg purple belt who’s also a judoka. Have a Plan B. BJJ teaches you to always have a Plan B. Allow yourself to flow. Chain your movements. The triangle fails; go for the arm bar. They stack you; finish the omoplata.

Likewise, in life we don’t always get our ideal outcome. Sometimes we have to opt for Plan B (or C, or D). That’s ok, we’re used to it by now.

Right now, we’re all at home or work (or at home working) and wishing we could get back to the mats. This situation is certainly not our Plan A. All we can do is work on our next steps.

We can take the setback we’re feeling now with a smile. We can be grateful for the hard work we’ve put in and the progress we’ve made. If you’re still training from home then this is a new challenge for you to work hard. You might be starting from zero, having never trained alone before, but that’s okay too.